Fear .... Aggression and Anger

Yes, my book project is still on-going!   Some of you have asked about the date of release.   I do not have a set date for completion and it will still take time in the print process.   I will post it when it is out and ready to be purchased ... my writing is only one part of my working schedule, so I do not write every day!  It has been some time since I wrote a blog, so here is one to reflect on for a while.

Since I last wrote a blog topic, I have encountered several situations in my work with similar themes.  I am reminded about how common these themes really are.  I decided to put in a quick blog to assist those with whom I am working with - overseas, in North America and here in my own community.  This blog will answer some of the e-mails and phone consults I have received and provide a reminder of some of the things we have discussed.  As these topics are so very common in society, we can all gain benefit from reviewing them.

Face your fear

Let's take a look at fear. 

This past spring, my father came for a visit (he has since passed away a few months ago but is with us always in our hearts and fondest memories).  My son enjoyed visits with his grandfather and liked taking my father around the property (we live in the country), and finding bugs, reptiles, and fish in the pond to look at.

They found snakes several times over the years.  We have pictures of snakes in bushes, in pails and so on.   This one day, my son told my Dad to bring the snake they found over to show me and to pick it up so he could take a picture of it.  I have pictures and a video of my Dad holding the snake by its tail and it squirming around wildly.  As I came up to them, I said,   'Hey - the snake could get hurt and is very uncomfortable being held like that.'    My Dad said,  'Well, I am scared of getting bit.'   I walked over to my Dad and said, 'Here give it to me and watch this - it's far more uncertain of what you are going to do to it ... look at how big you are!'  I took the snake and transferred it gently from hand to hand as it thrashed around, carefully avoiding its head.   I projected a sense of calm and told them to be still and quiet.  It started to slow down its movements until eventually I had it sitting up in my hand quietly.  My son then took one of his best pictures - the one you see here.

My father was surprised - he asked: 'You are not afraid of getting bit?'  I said,  'Well, sure, some snakes will bite, but it is because they are protecting themselves when feeling threatened.  Don't give them a reason to feel threatened and most of the time you will not get bit.  The way you were handling it made the snake feel threatened so it likely may have bitten you.'

I am accustomed to being in nature and catching snakes as well as other creatures for me and my son to look at.  We were hiking some time later and caught a much larger snake than this one and were able to calm it down in the same manner - until it sat quietly on my arm.   I was bitten by a small snake like the one in the photo above many years ago, but when I went to catch it, I hesitated and felt fear for an instant and in that instant of hesitation, I was bitten.

Our minds get in the way like this in many things - for those of you who have trained in the movement arts with me for some time, you will know how this relates to your body and to freedom of movement as well ... freedom on the inside corresponds to freedom in the outside.  Inside creates outside ... in many ways.


A few years ago, we came across a crow in the middle of the nearby highway.  It appeared disoriented and I decided to pull over and pick it up, as I felt concerned that it might get run over.  I used a shirt to grab it and to hold it and I brought it into the vehicle.  As we drove away, it was thrashing about wildly with its eyes bulging.  I held it in such a way that it could not bite me, and I calmed my insides down and then held it close to me and began to sing a gentle song for it.  I just made it up in the moment and it had a lullaby quality to it.  Soon, it stopped thrashing about and it settled down and relaxed - always looking into my face.  I kept this bird in my house for three weeks as it rehabilitated.  We became fast friends.  When it was time for it to go, I let it go ...   What struck me was the way it settled down when I sang and how it never took its eyes off me; I felt as though it understood that I would not hurt it.  Once it settled down, I never had another issue with it.   This experience made me think about fear and the unknown.  When we are in a situation that we are unsure of and we feel threatened, we have reactions that come out in our behaviours; we, too, can  thrash around emotionally, mentally and physically ... we, too, can be calmed.   Though we can seek out assistance or come across it (there are so many loving caring people in the world who are happy to offer assistance), when we are in suffering or in pain, sometimes we are alone and must learn how to tame the inner beast ourselves. 

These stories remind me that if/when we can feel the fear, face the fear, and move forth regardless of it, we can then come into the place we need to be in order to cope, to heal, to see clearly etc.   Many times, we find that our fear was misplaced to the reality of what is truly before us in the moment.   Other times, feeling fear is a gift: it is telling us to get out of a dangerous place or away from a dangerous person or situation.   The trick lies in knowing which is which.

Go back in the older blogs I wrote and read about my experiences with shrews and deer mice.  I am a huge fan of deer mice - they also make great pets.   Rats are wonderful creatures as well.  I learned directly through observations of shrews how fear leads to tension which, in extreme cases, can lead to death (or intense perceptions of stress ... I say perception because in all situations I encountered with shrews, they were not treated badly - they were simply very aggressive and tense upon being captured, which we had to do as they were coming into the house).   Go back and read the story in my earlier blog ... deer mice are very different by nature.   Are you more like the shrew or the deer mouse?   Fear ... your inner reactions to things ... affects your health very directly .. the way you move very directly and the quality of peace and ease in your life ... very directly.


Fear and anger are often related.  Sometimes, when someone is angry and we look a little deeper, we can find that Fear is the actual root.  We discuss aggression and anger below.



Anger and aggression

Some of you have spoken to me about dealing with frustration, anger and other aggressive tendencies - either in yourselves or in those with whom you are in relationship with.   Yes, with Work we can transform aggressive energy.  One thing which is helpful is to seek out guidance and work through these things with counsel.  Assistance from someone can bring forth insight and practical suggestions for Work which can transform and heal these physical, mental and emotional states.   One way in which aggression can transform is when it is utilized outwardly in some sort of creative work.

 It is also beneficial to do movement.  Have you ever done forms or run or push-ups when feeling angry?  The upper body is important to clear out which is why people sometimes punch things when they feel anger ... the energy runs up and out the arms so we can take advantage of that and clear it out.  Have you felt this in your own body?  If you are sensitive to it, you will actually feel the energy rise up and move into the arms.  With developed awareness and choreography of your own energy, you can take advantage of this and release it so your body does not hold the charge in a negative way ... which it will, in the form of accumulated tensions over time.

Fear is also held in the body in the same way... in the form of accumulated tensions over time.  You can see how this happens, for example, when someone freezes and is unable to move when frightened, as fear often affects the legs.  Sometimes people have been known to collapse in response to a situation.  These are extreme examples, though, and most people are not aware of how fear traps energies, drains energies and creates unnecessary tensions in their bodies, as most are not sensitive or aware enough to feel this as it happens.   When reacting to things, we have less ability to respond with appropriate action in the moment.  Tensions due to fear can appear in other parts of the body as well.  

How often do you feel angry?  Look and see if this is a habitual pattern for you, though, and if so, we have to look a little deeper.  In the moment, movement can clear out a lot of this pent up energy and assist one in relaxing.  The important thing to do is to deal with the root so it doesn't end up becoming a chronic issue.

One of my teachers once told me that anger is misdirected unfocused energy.  With proper guidance, we can learn to bring awareness to aggression in the moment and to channel it and focus it into something positive.

What are your thoughts, beliefs or feelings around an aggressive aspect of someone's (or your own) nature?   Here is a different story about a snake:

There once was a very fierce and venomous snake.  One day this snake met a wise teacher of the wisdom ways and was overpowered by the sage's gentle nature.  In that moment, the snake lost its ferocity.  The teacher told the snake to stop hurting people and so the snake, impressed with the sage's peaceful nature, made a vow to live life innocently and not to harm anyone ever again.

As the snake went forth in life, people began to realize that it was harmless and innocent and began to bully it, harass it and tease it continuously.   The snake was having a rough time wherever it went.

One day, the snake came across the same teacher and when the sage saw how abused the snake had been, sat down to talk with it.   After listening to the snake for some time, the teacher said: 'Unfortunately, you have mistaken my advise and have been applying it in the wrong way.  By nature, you are a snake.  You hiss and frighten those around you and so they do not bother you.  I asked you to stop going around hurting people by injecting them with your venom without cause; I never said you couldn't hiss at or scare off those who would wish to do you harm.'

This is a great story about balance.   Sometimes we are angry because we are being taken for granted, or are being abused, disrespected and/or have put up with far too much for far too long.  To go around injecting everyone with our poisonous venom before we know their intentions will not remedy the situation.  It is part of our Work to unravel the hows and whys of what we are feeling ... looking for the root of it all, we can dig it up and lay it to rest finally.  In the meantime, we can hiss at and scare off those who would wish to do us harm (whether they are conscious of the effect their words or actions have on us or not) and be OK with that too.  Repressing or suppressing our anger will not enable us to determine the best direction for our focused energy in the moment.

Sometimes we are imbalanced in our physical, mental or emotional aspects and this can lead to anger as well.  It is up to us to determine the roots and to cultivate a more harmonious state.   When our organs have imbalances our emotions are also affected.  Movement and breath work assists us in clearing out tensions and energy blockages and are very helpful in restoring meridian balance, muscle and tissue relaxation.   Diet can also wreak havoc on our emotional and mental states, as what we eat can create  imbalances in the organ and system functions in our body and this can also impact how we feel and think.   Looking at ourselves holistically is therefore vital.

So for those of you who have various fears or aggression manifesting in your lives, remember these stories and keep working.  If you are not one of my students, seek out guidance or counsel sessions ...channel these energies out of your body via body and breath work as you need it and keep moving onward in your journey.

Cleaning the mirrors of perception

I am currently working on a book project, so though I like to have a monthly post, I may write shorter ones or skip a month.  I recommend that you go over my previous posts ... the post topics have depth and layers of meanings and so you can pick up new insights over time as you continue to do your Work ...  we all know how we tend to pick up different things when we read material several times.

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Perception is a vast topic in philosophy, sciences and psychology.  Today I have posted some simple statements about perception in practical terms as it relates to our interaction with ourselves, others and various atmospheres and environments we encounter.


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When we perceive with clarity, we can see someone newly and not through our old filters of how they once were ... or how they may have responded to us in certain circumstances or environments in the past.   How much can change?   People are capable of amazing transformations ... we must be sure we really know someone before we assume they are as they have always been.

If we approach others that know someone or once knew someone and ask opinions about this person, we must be cautious about making assumptions that this information is 100% accurate.  Sometimes it is, to be sure ... sometimes it is not.  We often perceive others through our own dirty mirrors and see in them the things we project outward and disown within ourselves.   Other times, if/when we know ourselves well, we can see others equally clearly ... as our mirrors are cleaner.    Be aware of distortion!

When people or things alter and we are unable to see these changes, it is a reflection of our own unconsciousness and sleep-walking patterns as unaware beings.   Due to our own issues, we may be sure that we know someone ... meanwhile we neither know them deeply nor do we know ourselves.


When something is presented to us and we are unable to see through its glamour ... or its falseness ... or its trickery ... or its ignorance, it is the reflection of the same things mentioned above ... our own distorted mirrors ... our own unconsciousness ...

In the same room with others, we will perceive things according to our own level of being, level of awareness etc.  When we react to someone because they point out things we have missed that was going on right in front of them, it is simply our ignorance showing through ... our psychological buffers   (buffers are amazing things, they literally create psychological blind spots to perceiving things as they are) ... our ego gets in the way! ... in other words, we often react to things because of our self-importance ... we are unable to accept that we are wrong and our perception of what is before us is not accurate.  It is vital that we work to correct this, as we could potentially be ripe for the ignorant manipulations of others ... as well as being ripe to lies we unconsciously tell ourselves.

When someone says something about us that is simply not true, it ought not be as important to us as if WE were to believe something that is not true about our own self.  Work to be free of the concerns of what others think of you ... imagine about you ... gossip about you ... perceive about you ... judge about you ... Care more about working to come to know yourself better than anyone else knows you.   Once you reach this self-knowing, all concern drops away and there is inner peace ... acceptance and further growth.

When we do not desire to see the truth about ourselves in the moment, we are self-deceivers.   We can often see this in action:  Simply tell someone directly what you see them doing in the moment in a non-threatening way ...  if your mirrors are truly clean and you are seeing clearly in that moment, and they do not see themselves clearly, they will disagree ... if they have a self-important image, they will show a subtle postural shift (you have now triggered them and they are about to fall into an unconscious pattern), followed by a behaviour to match it,  and you will be able to tell that a part of their psyche does not want to hear what you are saying ... or simply, they may not wish for you to see them as they are.   In these cases, it is very difficult to convince someone of what they are doing or how they are behaving in that moment.   It may not be the right time for you to pursue this, and often, if you do, you may be met with subtle or highly aggressive behaviour.  Simply step back, back off and realize that it is a part of the person's buffer system, inner resistance, reluctance to see in their own mirror, and a sign that their psyche may simply not be ready to deal with the truth you are presenting.   It is also possible that the person may be aware of what you are talking about, but simply does not wish to own up to that to you ... this is a sign that they have a self-image with you that they do not wish to have disrupted for some reason.


Also as you work to apply this ... remember to apply it yourself first ...watch yourself ... clean your own mirrors first ... discover your own postural changes and behavioural shifts when you are triggered by someone or something .... find your own buffers and work to remove them .... all of the above can be improperly applied if/when we are not working with clean mirrors ourselves.    Know thyself first ... and then you will know/understand and perceive others and everything around you even better.

Walking Meditations in Nature

While the movement Arts we teach are meditation in motion, we can also hike in nature and meditate.  Find a nice quiet place to visit often.  Spend time sitting by a body of water or near a tree ... breathe in the fresh air ... allow your thoughts to come as they will and float away the way a cloud moves across the sky.

If you are hiking, pay attention to your breath ... feel the muscles in your body as you move ... use your senses ...  listen to the many subtle sounds in nature ... feel your heatbeat ... take in the rich aromas around you ... breathe in through all the pores in your body, taking in the rich energies around you ... breathe out and release all you no longer want to carry around.  Feel yourself relaxing with each step you take.    As new thoughts arise, allow them to float away without lingering with them ... without identifying with them ... without creating stories ... let them simply be ... come and go ...


Walking mediations in nature assist us in connecting with All that Is around us and within us.   Camping, hiking, walking mediations, relaxing by a nice fire, sipping herbal teas on a beach ... make sure you create time and space to enjoy the beauty ... connect!

Forgiveness, Healing and Inner Freedom

Forgiveness purifies us and frees us

There is much written about forgiveness.  It is not a novel concept to come across ideas regarding healing, spiritual growth and forgiveness.  Forgiveness is also a very important part of any mental/emotional work, as it is one of the major keys we Work with in most healing modalities or spiritual paths we walk and/or study. 

Working as a counsellor and teacher for many years, I frequently come across individuals who have challenges letting go and healing from painful past memories.  Many of us carry burdensome fears, grief, guilt, painful memory loops, resentments, anger, revenge fantasies, frustrations and so on from past experiences involving difficult situations with others from past relationships - whether with family, friends, work environments or even strangers.  In most cases, various levels of health issues are also a part of these individuals' experiences.


People have shared many traumatic stories with me and I have had a few of my own stories to contend with, so inner pain is no stranger to most people I have met ... no stranger to me.  

The pain individuals feel can also be seen on a larger scale in cultures/groups who have been unnecessarily targeted with fear, hatred, greed, power and control issues.   Don't we all have stories ... individuals and cultures alike?  Don't we also have a collective human story? 

Throughout our collective histories, human lives have been full of stories of suffering and pain.  When we review our histories and cultural stories, we can find endless examples of needless suffering and pain.  I use the term needless, here to shift our topic today towards personal responsibility.  

External causes of suffering and pain occur in situations like war, when people are killed and tortured needlessly.  Yet these wars go on - murder and torture continues even today when we like to imagine we are far more civilized.  We wage wars inside of ourselves as much as wars are waged externally.  Once again, we find this principle of macrocosm and microcosm ... or as within, so without.  Individually and collectively we are responsible for our inner and outer world conditions.

Examine your own inner world.  Examine your health, your body, your tensions, your postural holding patterns, your breath.   Just as we are meant to be free of tyranny and war and pain as a collective people on this planet, so too are we meant to be free within ourselves ... in our bodies, minds/emotions, and spirits.   Forgiveness is so huge due to what it does to us when we do not let go and forgive.  Much of what we hold onto we are no longer even conscious of, so when someone tells us we are in need of forgiveness, we may imagine otherwise!  It may be shocking to you to realize how much you do hold onto when you may imagine you have nothing to forgive ... your body, your habits, your reflections in the World say otherwise!

Again, I ask, in a new way (as somewhere in the pages I have written elsewhere, I point to this idea):  How can a people so riddled with inner wars, disharmonies and incongruencies ever hope to live in peace on a larger worldly scale? How can we hope to attain optimal health given the conditions of our inner states?

In my Work, the individual is a key.  I am my own key and have my own Work.  Start freedom within yourself.  Heal yourself.  Free yourself from inner bondage and war.  Let your scars heal.  Uncover your own self-protective measures from wars which may have been long gone in your inner and collective histories ... in yourself and in your family and ancestral lines.  If you are currently in a stressful, traumatic situation and your inner war is here and now, then you must take the steps to get the support, guidance and tools to free yourself and to heal.

Just like outer wars are justified in our world, where all parties have their own stories, are convinced they alone are justified and deny personal responsibility, we too do exactly the same thing.  I often encounter huge layers of resistance and buffers within individuals ... I have to deal with their justifications and layers of inner defences to seeing themselves clearly and to seeing the parts they have played in their own suffering, health issues and mental/emotional patterns.  I also walk this path myself, so I understand that it is not always an easy one.   Everyone could use a cleaner mirror - not everyone is prepared to look and see what is truly there under their preferred view of who and how they imagine themselves to be.


There is no one immune to the above description, though I have met many who imagine themselves to be somewhere they are simply not.   We easily fall into illusions and cycle around in circles going back the same place when we imagine we are progressing - which happens when we get caught up in self-importance and illusion.   Don't we see this too on a cultural level?   People die for causes they are convinced are justified and yet simply do not see the fallacy and false ideas they cling to.  This Work is very individual and is the exact reason why we get so much variety in results to efforts in the field of healing and spiritual Work.

I have said and will continue to say again that this is very individual Work and one only gets the results according to what one is ready for, is able to do and according to the personal inner level of Being one can Work to attain with consistent Work over time.  For those who have asked for the keys to healing, these two paragraphs hold the biggest key: Quite frankly, once you are on a true Path, you and you alone determine your attainable level of healing, inner freedom and spiritual development.  


Prayers and affirmations have been used since we have records of histories.   Since we all do have inner dialogues anyway, these prayers and affirmations are useful tools in replacing the many negative patterns we have developed over time.   As a close to this topic, I offer you three levels of prayer and affirmation in relation to healing through forgiveness: one of the keys we work with.   If they speak to you, use them for your personal work.  You can also create the three in your own words according to how you like to state things and according to your own beliefs:

Three levels of forgiveness: 

Level 1 is forgiving others:   We forgive others in order to free ourselves from carrying around all the trapped energies in relation to these experiences ... imagined or real.

Level 2 is asking for forgiveness from others:   We ask for forgiveness in order to admit personal responsibility for things we may have thought, said or done which may have contributed to the suffering of another.

Level 3 is forgiving ourselves:  we forgive ourselves, which is often the hardest ... which can sometimes also be why we (sometimes unconsciously) find it challenging to forgive others.



If you desire to work with forgiveness and speak to these people directly, you can do so, but it is not necessary if you feel that it would either be inappropriate, or that the individual would not be receptive, or that you simply wish to do it on your own.

LEVEL 1

 

Think of a person and do one at a time for a deeper effect.  Then, in certain parts, be more specific with the memories...ie.  say what you are forgiving them for.


--  I forgive you for your ignorance ... for not knowing better ... or for knowing better and not doing better

--   I forgive you for any and all things you have done or that I imagined you have done.

--   I have suffered due to my reactions to these things and have experienced pain and perhaps various illnesses or health issues as a result of this inner suffering.  I am ready to let go of all of that now.

--   I have been unhappy and unwilling and unable to free myself in order to fully give to life what I really am.

--   I forgive you for not being able to do better

--  I forgive you because I know that in order to inflict pain, one must also be in pain or be so out of touch with their essential nature that they do not know what they are doing - nor the consequences of doing so ... I can feel compassion for someone in that state

-- I forgive you ... I can let you go ... I release any and all negative ties, emotions, mental movies and projections of any sort between us on any and all levels

--   I expect nothing from you, for I am able to free myself from this inner suffering and require nothing from you in order to do so

--  I let go of any conscious or unconscious desire to punish you for anything from this day forward ... I release any and all negative emotions, memories and thoughts of you or what you may have done or what I may have imagined

--  I now forgive you.....     I now open my heart .....   I now send you a blessing of healing for any suffering of your own

LEVEL 2

 

 

--  Please forgive me for times I have been ignorant ... for the times I did not know better ... for the times I knew better and did not do better .... forgive me  ...

 

--  Forgive me, please,  for ever thinking, saying or doing anything that may have contributed to your suffering in any way ... forgive me for not doing, thinking or saying what may have assisted you in some way ...

 

 

--  Forgive me for anything I may have done or for what you may have imagined I did or said ... forgive me anyway

 

 

--   Forgive me for the times I was in pain and lashed out in negative ways ... I am so sorry that my pain caused you any grief or suffering of any kind

 

 

--   Forgive my imperfections and patterns I am aware of and work to transform and forgive all that I do not yet see I am responsible for

 

 

 

LEVEL 3

 

 

-- I forgive myself for all I have done ... for my ignorance ... for not knowing better ... for the times I knew better and did not do better

 

 

--  I forgive myself for any and all negative thoughts, words and actions over the course of my life

 

 

--  I take responsibility for all I have done and I realize that I made mistakes due to ignorance, due to my suffering and due to my own pain

 

 

--  I forgive myself and hereby let go of any need to further punish myself ...whether mentally/emotionally, physically or spiritually ...

 

 

 

--  I open my heart ... I am free ... I am healed ... I release anyone and anything from any expectations ... I  hold onto nothing which can harm me ...  In every moment I am able to let go of more ... open my heart more ... release more ...

 

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When you do these prayers and affirmations, you would find an extra benefit and result if you do one of the following things:

 

--  if you go to a church, go when they are open and it is quiet and take the time to spend with this exercise ... the environment will add a huge benefit ... if you can do candles, light one for each person you work with in the forgiveness exercise

 

--  if you do not attend church and enjoy nature, go to a very special spot and do it there ... you can bring candles if you wish

 

--  if you do not choose to go outside or do not wish to or can't for some reason, set up a special place at home ...  make an altar and have your candles ready there ... set it up to do one person for each candle or do all the people and have one candle ...this will depend on how long you feel you require for each person you want to forgive and release ...are you doing this all in one day/  are you breaking it up into several workings?  Consider all this and design it as you feel it will work for you ... you can always do it again!

 

You have this idea now.  you can use these prayers and affirmations or you can get the ideas, and create your own ways of saying these things.   Pick a time every day, pick the people in your life you know you have to do this work with and begin to do these with real feeling daily until you feel the shift inside yourself.  Perhaps you need to work with one person for days or weeks ... perhaps it is all at once ... no one can tell you how long ... here is the tool and the Work is individual.  You know it is real when a shift happens, you heal something, you gain energy, your outlook shifts, and so on.  Sometimes we return to this work to find there is more to let go or new things to let go....

 

Forgive and heal

Forgive and be free

Forgive and let go

Forgive and Live

Forgive and open your heart
Forgive and BE in Peace

Forgive, ask for forgiveness and forgive yourself 





Remember, as with all things, be gentle with yourself and with this process.  We have the ability to do this without adding more pain ... feel the freedom and joy this brings and allow it to BRING YOU MORE LIFE!

Holding your own Atmosphere and Alice in the Dark Hole

 

Hold yourself with balance and control  ... never abandon Your Self

One of the reasons we experience difficulties with manifesting our true potential is that we are often swayed by the atmospheres of others ... or by the various environments we find ourselves in.

For many of us, if we are surrounded by negative people, we find ourselves in a negative state some time later - or even right away (and I am not suggesting that we are always aware of this).  We also become roused and excited when in the atmosphere of excitement.  Children feel pressured into fitting in with their peers and families and most adults are no different.  To demonstrate individuality, unique creativity and thinking beyond the box of what is considered NORMAL is often seen as a threat ... or worse - madness.

Have you seen the movie Alice in Wonderland with Johnny Depp?  The movie starts off with a scene called Dreamers and Alice is a little girl.   She wakes up late in the night with another one of her nightmares.  Her father takes her back to her room to talk with her.  She explains the recurring nightmare to him as falling into a dark hole and seeing strange creatures.  She tells him about these creatures and then asks him if he thinks she has 'gone around the bend'.  He places his hand on her head and says quite seriously,  'I'm afraid so.  You're mad ... bonkers ... off your head.  But I'll tell you a secret - all the best people are.' 

Alice grows up into a fine young woman and is still having this recurring dream.  She wonders if it is normal to keep having the same dream over and over.  Her father has since passed away - leaving her no one she can talk to about these things.  Her mother wishes to see Alice happy - supporting the proposal of a marriage to someone Alice does not find herself compatible with.  It is clear that her mother does not think like her father did - and certainly does not understand Alice.  She tries to get Alice to be a 'proper' girl: 

Alice's mother:  'Where's your corset?'
Alice:                  Looks at her mother (somewhat annoyed, it seems to me), saying nothing.

Alice's mother lifts up Alice's dress and looks disapprovingly at her:  'And no stockings,'  she says.

Alice:  'I'm against them.'
Alice's mother:  'But you're not properly dressed.'

Alice:  'Who's to say what is proper?  What if it was agreed that proper was wearing a codfish on your head.  Would you wear it?  To me, a corset is like a codfish.'

Alice is taken to an engagement party - where she is going to be asked to marry a young Lord.  It is obvious that they are not well matched and Alice runs off at the last second -- right in front of the crowd as she was proposed to.  She disappears into the forest and 'falls into a dark hole' ... not unlike her dream, likely.  ( As a side note, consider, here the relation to the astral plane and dreamtime.   Those who are so inclined find much growth certainly does occur in just such the manner that Alice experiences ... albeit in differing degrees, depending on the nature of the person).

She finds herself facing puzzles that question her current view of reality.  Along the way she meets up with very interesting characters and finds that the best of friends are sometimes found in the most unlikely places. 

What happens to her in there is quite fascinating.  She finds out that some of the creatures she comes across are not at all sure that she is the same Alice they have seen there before.  She wonders if she is in a dream.  During the adventures in this strange land, she discovers she is indeed the Alice of the prophesy and the same Alice these creatures and beings have seen before.  She undergoes a transformation of sort:  She is told she is not the same Alice ... then she is called almost Alice ... to Alice indeed  ... in her full glory.  

Alice struggles with her identity and is very confused when the others talk about her as though she was the wrong Alice:

``You'd think she would remember all this from the first time``  (she has obviously been here before, and doesn't seem to recall)

``You brought the wrong Alice!``   (Imagine that it takes Alice of a certain nature to complete this task  .. so it is with us and manifesting our true potential, is it not?))

``She's the right one - I'm certain of it``

``Give her a chance!``

``I told you she is the right Alice!``

``I am not convinced``

``She doesn't look anything like herself``    ``That's because she is the wrong Alice!``

Alice:  ``How could I be the wrong Alice, when this is MY dream?``             (How, indeed - a good question...)

``Absolum will know who she is.``

Alice:  ``Who is this Absolum?``

``He is wise.  He is Absolute.``    


People have various ways of accessing the divine in their search to discover themselves ... who they really are ... what they are really capable of ... in Wonderland, it is Absolum who assists Alice  (among other interesting characters who also assist her)  and determines when she is 'Alice indeed'   .... what and where is Wonderland?   ... the answer to that tells you who Absolum really is ... how you answer that tells of your level of being, your personal belief system and so on ... so answer it for yourself ...



In Wonderland, Absolum is a blue caterpillar.  He is known in the land as being all knowing.   Alice has a few interesting encounters with him.  He is one of the ones who states quite definitively that ``this is not the same Alice that was here before.''  Each time she meets up with him, he assesses her current state until he finally tells her that she is Alice indeed.   This is not until she seems to come back to having her ``muchness`` return to her when she succeeds in her mission while there.   How do we access this muchness ... how do we lose it, and if/when lost, how do we regain this?


Alice ends up fulfilling the prophesy as laid out and even slays the Jabberwalkie in order to save the land from being controlled by the obsessive, jealous, conniving and ignorant Queen of Hearts.

  

Alice has no one to talk with about her dreams ... or about seeing things differently than what is considered normal and acceptable in the social circles her family engages with (and also different than what was considered normal during those times in the culture she was in).    As we see in the beginning of the movie, her father was a man who believed in dreams, taking risks, and forging into the unknown - even at the risk of being called mad himself by his fellow colleagues.  But her father is no longer there, and Alice embarks on an inner journey of discovering and recapturing her true inner essence, which is also quite different from the norm - but brilliant indeed. 

This story is a reminder to us that "Great Spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds" (Einstein).     Throughout history, we have seen time and time again that humans cling to what is known (or what they perceive and BELIEVE to be the truth at the time).  Forging outside the edge of what is considered acceptable, appropriate, common knowledge, popular religious belief, current social standards, family beliefs and traditions etc. still continues to haunt those spirits who are not at ease with what is already being done, but who go before others and pave the way for further growth and advancement in all fields and endeavors. 

There are times, in some people's lives, where they feel they may be standing on the brink of a precipice ... or a fork in the road ... or a dark place with no support or anyone to relate to ... or in a place in life in which there are sooo many routes to choose from ... with every move we alter our path in life ... sometimes it takes falling into a dark hole and entering Wonderland to see the path that is fully ours.   Sometimes, risking appearing mad is necessary in order to do something great.


Though often ridiculed, judged, isolated and/or labelled in one way or another, these individuals are the ones who can lead us to new heights.  Sometimes, they have a Queen of Hearts to deal with or a Jabberwalkie to slay ... or Lords to leave ... or families to disappoint (as many families have projections and expectations on us and how our own dream SHOULD look like .... according to whom?)    In the end, once they make it through their own Wonderland, they come out on the other side stronger,  prepared to move forward and ignore the opposition they are likely to encounter ... daring to believe in their own visions and expanding the known world's horizons.


 One last point about the movie:    Once Alice is close to completing her mission, she is convinced that Wonderland is all a dream and that none of what she's encountered while there truly exists. This upsets the Mad Hatter - who has become quite fond of her, and who is not aware that he isn't real ... by the end of the movie, the lines between what is real and what is a dream are thinning.   When Alice wakes up from her `fall into the hole`, she does not marry the Lord ... she stands up to all the guests, her mother, her sister, and engages in a business deal which is quite out of character for a young lady of that time. The gentleman who takes her on as an apprentice in his company can see her brilliance and steps out of the norm himself.     Alice is Alice indeed .... suddenly quite confident and assured within herself. The movie ends with her embarking on a journey aboard a ship.    A beautiful butterfly flies by her and she sees it as Absolum.    This leaves us with a wondrous feeling:   Was it REALLY a dream?    What is real and what is a dream?    She is transformed ...  how could it not be real in some way?   And do we really need to define that?


The end of the movie, with the butterfly reminds me of an old story from Chinese philosophy.  Rather than going into an explanation of this, I leave it up to you to reflect on over time ... its meaning may change for you over time as well - even if you have heard this before:


The Butterfly Dream by C.W. Chan

Once upon a time, Chuang Tzu dreamed that he was a butterfly, flying about enjoying itself.  

It did not know that it was Chuang Chou.

Suddenly, he awoke, and veritably was Chuang Chou again.

He did not know whether it was Chuang Chou dreaming that he was a butterfly, or whether it was the butterfly dreaming that it was Chuang Chou.

Between Chuang Chou and the butterfly, there must be some distinction.  This is a case of what is called the transformation of things.

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The story of the transformation of Alice holds a key: all (true) mystery schools hold keys which can open doors for us.  Though there is never any guarantee to our personal results, this is due to us and us alone.  Like the journey Alice took, we may find our way into Wonderland ... what we will find is part of our own story and our own possibilities.
 

Crow and Coyote

How lovely for the timing of this topic this week, as I received a phone call from someone today (after this post was already up for a few days ... today is Monday the 18th) and had the opportunity to play coyote!   Or as a loving family member taught me: `` I played in the garden with someone today``.    We have much to learn from one another, but it is not always clear who is doing the learning.   We can play with trickster energies, remain open and play in the garden ...

And if we play in the garden and find that our lovely friend is really a snake ... remember... in the end, the only one who is deceived is the deceiver themselves ... Look to the end of this blog topic to find an added piece on the snake.

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Many cultures around the world have nature-based spiritual philosophies and ways of teaching and coming to Know about the inner and outer world(s). 

I have always enjoyed teachings from many sources and see real value in being open to various ways of perceiving things ... various paths of study in spiritual disciplines.   I am especially fond of nature teachings.  After all, the 5 element and 5 animal style of Kung fu I teach comes from the ancient direct observation (or called stalking in shamanism) of these things ... direct experience and observations of these things over long periods of time ... centuries if one considers accumulated experiences.

Today I want to bring up my fondness for Crow and Coyote.  We do not study these animals in Kung fu, Chi Kung or Yoga, but I have encountered these animals in nature, have stalked them, and have also had teachings and personal experiences with various animals we find here in North America.  


Crow     

Crow has had many associations over time.   Today I will talk about one aspect of Crow: its ability to See and to Call out what it Sees.

Crow energy, as I was taught by one of my teachers, involves the ability to Call it as you see it.  One of the gifts of this type of individual is that he or she sees into things that others gloss over and then feels the urge to do something ... bring something into the light ... he or she feels to sit up high on a perch and CAW CAW  ... look, here, I have something to say about this and you may not want to hear it, but I will say it none the less.   In many cases he or she is not the popular one in the crowd.  Our histories are full of real life stories where people have been persecuted for having this gift. 

For the most part, those who are popular in most crowds tend to follow the crowd.  Over the course of our history we see many examples of this in politics ... politicians and other leaders have often given us lip service in order to win votes ... this is a popularity contest.   It takes leadership and authority to step out of the norm and Caw it like you see it.  It takes a good sense of self to speak up if a view is different than what is considered the popular or accepted one.  Some politicians and leaders have been this sort of example, and we are in dire need of more. 

It takes a higher level of consciousness and awareness to see things the way they really are as well.  To call it as you see it takes courage as well as discernment.  Crow in the light brings things up that others would prefer to brush under the carpet ... turn a blind eye to ... go unconscious about ...  Crow in the light is all around us.  Cultivate these qualities within yourself.

Crow in the dark is mistaken about what he or she is seeing due to a lack of higher wisdom, consciousness and awareness.   Crow in the dark does not Know Oneself.   Individuals stuck here will bring things up that may be a projection of his or her own darkness within.  Negativities within this us may then become projected out into the world around us as we sit up on our perch and  CawCaw ... calling everyone on their stuff while forgetting to look within and do our own work too.   Crow in the dark speaks up and speaks out views that are incorrect ... like preaching that the Earth was flat!   There are more popular views today that are also incorrect ... can you see them for what they are .... crow in the dark is all around us ... develop the ability to see it for what it is.



Coyote

Coyote is another marvelous teacher.  Coyotes are known for their tricks.  Here, in the country, even as I write this blog, coyotes are known to work together when hungry in order to trap and attack a tame dog so they can eat.  I will give you an example of how they have been reported doing this:  One of the coyotes plays coy... calling out and even darting in and out of a bushy or wooded area as though to call the pet dog out to play.  When the dog goes out to check it out, the other coyotes attack it and then eat. 

Coyote in the light works by tricking us.  We may see our loved one, friend, or a teacher behave one way and then another.  Things may appear to be full of contradictions and soon we find we are confused.   This is not always a negative!  After all, what in this universe or in nature all around us is always exactly the same - energies are always moving no matter how static things may appear to be.  Trickster energy is at work when an individual tricks us by catching us being rigid or judgmental or assuming that we know exactly what this person or thing is all about.  

In a teacher, trickster energy may be used consciously or come out in a students projections of how things should be.   As a student ... and even as a teacher, one can always learn from the mirrors presented with coyote energy. 

Coyote energy can be light, tricking us into learning things in new ways ... learning through trickery.   If someone has coyote energy, they may appear one way in this moment and another way the next ... coyote adapts and cares little for flair or appearances.  Coyote is not always direct, but can fool you and become so when you least expect it.  Coyote energy is great for acting and for play!

Coyote in the dark  uses trickery for power, greed, personal gain at the expense of others involved.  Coyote in the dark will trick you and draw you in to his or her world where there is a potential for you to become a pawn in the world of someone else's dream.  Learn to develop discernment and wisdom for coyote in the dark ... as with anything, this requires higher consciousness, awareness and wisdom.

Things, people, places, life, our world, philosophies, religions ... may not be as they appear to be ... in the light or in the dark!


Snake

Snake in the light is often used as symbol for the kundalini energy (taught in some Eastern spiritual disciplines ... as in some forms of Yoga) ... rising up the spine and clearing out blockages as it moves upwards within our main central channel (as we were taught in Kung fu and Chi Kung ... but also known in its physical representation as the spine).  In Kung fu, as we were taught, the word kundalini was never brought up, but working with moving the energies to clear out blockages and to heal and develop spiritually was.  We can feel these moving energies within us and kundalini rises whether you use the words or not, as a direct result of certain Work you do over time and according to how you Work ...   It is best to avoid attempts at forcing this energy to move prior to being prepared ... one can Work to do so over time and with awareness; however, one can also Work to force these things and this is not advised here.  We could speak of this in more detail, but this is not the space in which to do so. 

Symbology of the snake can be found in most cultures and various spiritual paths.  In some religions, it is seen as a symbol of evil, temptation - even the devil. 

Snake is found in the Garden of Eden story taught to Roman Catholics ... it is in this story that a snake tempts Eve (who represents the first woman) to take a bite out of an apple off the tree of knowledge ... a tree both herself and Adam (the first man) were forbidden to touch.   This story is very interesting and holds much inner meaning - which is misinterpreted to degrees depending on who is reading and interpreting this story ...  and then this is based on an individual's level of being or some understanding they may have picked up intellectually. 

The Virgin Mary in the Catholic faith can be found depicted in a statue or  picture holding her arms out and standing on planet Earth while stepping on and killing a snake.    My grandmother had such a statue, and when I asked her about it when I was about 6 years old, she told me the story she was taught.   Anyway, the snake, here represents evil ... what kind of evil?  Where did this originally come from?  Has the snake ever been looked at in the light? Has it ever represented something spiritual and positive?  If you spend the time and effort to ask and then search out these answers, you will find some interesting things out (if you haven't already ... this is common knowledge in these days).

Some sources even go as far as comparing a snake to a woman, as their beliefs teach them that woman is evil and a temptress in nature ... leading men to their fall spiritually.

In older spiritual cultures and traditions, the snake held a much more positive light.  Depending on which culture you look at, it represented and still represents many more things than what I wrote about above:  transformation and healing; transmutation of poisons in the body in order to heal; alchemy; wisdom expressed through healing; sexuality; a symbol for the sexual/creative life force energy within us as taught in Eastern spiritual traditions (Kundalini Energy Rising ... enlightening ... healing ... releasing ... transforming).   It has also represented death and rebirth as it sheds its skin and renews itself.  

Snake in the light brings about healing and transformation ... death of old things and old ways and rebirth into the new in one's life.   A person operating in snake in the light offers forth healing energies and provides an atmosphere in which others can heal and transform ... transmutate ...  and more.

Snake in the dark may represent someone manipulative and secretive in nature ... beguiling and lying ... twisting and turning things into something they are not ... bringing about death and decay without its associated rebirthing and regenerating ...  Snake in the dark resides in dark places, stalking its prey and striking swiftly with intent to harm, playing tricky mind games with ulterior motives ... then moving in for a direct hit.  Snakes can also hide in plain sight ... or hide in the light ... where they pretend to be something they are not.   Snake in the dark is another kind of trickster -- not one to use when teaching ... not one to use when growing or evolving ...

Snake has received negative attention for so long that many people still do know of its positive light and inner meaning behind the dark stories told in religions.   This is an example of how a symbol is altered over time and comes to mean what is only passed on in belief ... only by those who do not question and whom merely swallow what they are taught.  In order to go beyond the intellectual knowledge, then, one has to Work and then snake will ``show you the light`` inside and around yourself.  

Later, after some other projects are completed, I will write pages about the animals and elements as they pertain to the style of Kung fu I teach.  Snake has other references I have not discussed here.

A Mystical Path

We hear a lot about mysticism, the mystics, a mystical path and mystery schools etc.  What does all this really mean and how do we sort through so much surface stuff and get to a place where there is some real depth to our search for understanding and spiritual growth?

Let's look at the word mystic and mystical ...  it is defined in a Chambers dictionary as relating to mystery ... the mysteries ... or mysticism: mysterious : sacredly obscure or secret : involving a sacred or a secret meaning hidden from the eyes of the ordinary person, only revealed to a spiritually enlightened mind...

there is the key right there in the very last part of the above definition .... except that I would change the word ``mind`` to ``Being`` ... as the word `mind` as used here can be misinterpreted ....

We can see from this that a mystery school can be viewed as one which passes on teachings which may enable one to become enlightened ... to discover the hidden and secret meanings to things not seen by ordinary people.  What things?  All things in all aspects of life.  This could mean to See beyond the veil of the purely physical and external ... it can also mean to see the mirrors of self-reflection clearly ... and to experience what is beyond the scope of that which is experienced in ordinary life ... to delve into the extra-ordinary ... to become the extra-ordinary.   This does not mean merely more intellectual knowledge (which most places provide ample amounts of) ... though philosophy and knowledge is very helpful ... it relates more to direct experience and true transformation.

People see things differently based on their level of Being ... or you can look at it as based on their assemblage point of reality (as shamans do) ... or you can look at it as based on their level of enlightenment ... and so on.  Levels of Being are on a continuum which can be viewed as the progression of the soul or of an individual as he/she learns and evolves ...  it is individual and dependent on many factors (which we will not get into here).

A group of people study under a particular teaching and a number of teachers.  Many people in this study group see things in a similar way.  Several people see things in a different way.  Upon listening to many conversations, one may even wonder whether they studied under the same teachings and teachers at all.  This can occur with differences in levels of Being among students.   This may also occur when reading a book.  Several people may only find surface material to contemplate ... others walk away with deeper insights and wisdom.  We can find the same example in movies as well  as every day conversations with those around us ... and so on.  

We can only comprehend at the level we are at ... we can only SEE at the level we are at .... understand ... intuit ... evolve ... heal ... behave ... experience .... create ... and so on.  And no one but ourselves are responsible for any of the above.

This is what is meant by the old saying that one can walk right by the master and not see the person for what they are ... according to our level of Being once again ... we will judge ... assume ... interpret .... this is the same with a person's search for the mystery school or path of study ... we will get out of something exactly what we are at that point ... and nothing more ... until we are ready.

Souhl Center is a Mystery School ... we have the tools to show you a Way ... as in all Ways or True Spiritual Paths, you will experience things according to your own level ... your own ability and willingness to grow and evolve ...  and in your own time.